Wobble

FULL... OF... FEELINGS...

MUST... BOTTLE... UP...

I'm a mess. These feelings are not all bad feelings - just varied. And that can be exhausting. Let's chalk it up to wonky hormones and a stressful start to the week, shall we? 

Saturday's performance at the Conference Center was wonderful and for those of you who were looking, the lower part of my face made its Relief Society broadcast debut. Which is good, because my second chin is my favorite. I know I promised a wink, but the cameras must have caught me in between winks. Next time! ...Not really...

Honestly, I'm quite proud of our choir. It's hard to sing primary hymns without sounding like primary children. We did struggle early on in our rehearsals, of which we had only 6. Our director told us to sing like we were "fat and 35," so that helped. Besides the music, I was very impressed with the speakers. The new R.S. General Presidency made a very good first impression and articulated some things that were so very relevant to my current state of being. Shockingly so in some instances. I look forward to watching the broadcast again, not to check myself out (hey-hey!) but to revisit the speakers' messages. Especially Pres. Eyring's since I was near comatose at that point in the meeting. As much as I loved being there on Saturday, my mind and body were so exhausted that I don't think I fully appreciated each talk. But that's what LDS.org is for. And the Conference Ensign. 

Canyon Rim

We got a wave and a thumbs up from Pres. Uchtdorf. 
Imagine 300 Mormon girls giggling and waving as if, 
I don't know, David Archuleta walked into the 
Conference Center. Present company included.

Changing the subject... I used another men's room this evening. I was heading into Zumba and needed to stop by the powder room (that's the polite terminology), but alas, it was out of order. I wasn't in emergency mode this time, I just didn't want to walk clear across the building to find another ladies' room. And so, with nary a man in sight, I took a deep breath, walked in the conveniently located men's room, and locked the door behind me. It looked exactly like the ladies' room. No urinal or the like, just a single toilet. I was well at ease. Why must I share this?? Because my visits to the men's room have increased by 200% in the last week and a half. That's pretty remarkable. But not habit forming, I'm sure.

Oh, and we did something called The Wobble at Zumba tonight. And it is my new favorite dance. 

Rumbly Tumbly

Lunchtime at work brings all sorts of smells wafting from our break room. As I sit and wait for my own lunch break, I am treated to some pleasant smells that perk up my appetite. Others have the opposite effect. But lately whenever lunchtime rolls around, I can’t help but think of this song…

Up, down, up! 

 When I up, down, touch the ground

It puts me in the mood.

Up, down, touch the ground

In the mood… (smack, smack) for food.

I am stout, round, and I have found

Speaking poundage wise,

I improve my appetite

When I exercise. 

I am short, fat, and proud of that,

So with all my might

I up, down, up, down to

My appetite’s delight!

While I up, down, touch the ground

I think of things to chew… (like honey, milk, chocolate…)

With a hefty, healthy appetite

I’m a hefty, happy Pooh!

Workouts can give you an appetite. They can make your stomach go ts-ts-ts-ts-ts-ts-ts-ts... POP! I have been Zumba-ing pretty hardcore for the last couple months, but sometimes I feel as though I only use that time spent dancing as an excuse to make poor eating choices. “Should I have those fries? I know I shouldn’t… But I danced my pants off for a freakin’ hour at Zumba… Of course I should have those fries!” See? SABOTAGE. I've read that weight loss consists of 80% diet and 20% exercise. And here I am - no better than Pooh.

Just a few things...

I went to the store last evening and had my eye on some Easter candy, specifically a large bag of mini Snickers. They were on sale. My sister sneakily put them on the counter but I said  "Nay!" before the cashier could scan them. Willpower. On Friday I bought a Butterfinger - because you never know when you'll be hit by a Butterfinger craving. Then I didn't even eat that Butterfinger until Sunday afternoon. Some willpower. Last week I went up to Wendy's for a small frosty and left with a MEDIUM frosty and a kids meal. No willpower. But we are seeing improvement.

My arches have been giving me some trouble lately. Imagine having a charlie horse. Now imagine having a charlie horse in your foot. Yow. I have high arches and the workout shoes I wear have very little arch support, causing the following...

The sensation of sore, aching feet or arch pain refers to an inflammation and burning sensation at the arch of the foot. This inflammation is due to the excessive stretching of the fibrous tissue located along the bottom surface of the foot, called plantar fascia.

Plantar fascitis is the term named after this condition and described as inflammation of the fascia, muscles and ligaments on the bottom of the foot, causing pain in the heel and arch of the foot. (via eHow Health)

So I consulted Dr. Scholl's and bought a pair of arch support gel insoles. They've been helping a bit - I now have very little pain in my left foot. But that darn right foot... Always causing problems. Will Lauren ever dance again???

Did you know we had Conference this last weekend? Because I had basically forgotten until the night before. That doesn't usually happen. Usually I will have prepared myself a little beforehand. So I woke up early Saturday morning for the Zumba and by the time I came home I was inordinately grouchy. Shocking... I was not in the Conferencing mood and was less than enthusiastic when 10:00 rolled around. Feeling quite contrary, I stubbornly planted myself in front of the TV in my basement and didn't move until the first session was over. As the meeting began I remember thinking, "Okay, okay... I got this." Surprisingly (or not so surprisingly), I enjoyed each session and felt really inspired by many talks. Specifically those given by Elders Holland and Perry, Pres. Eyring, Pres. Uchtdorf (always... always, always), and Pres. Monson. They spoke with a frankness that was somewhat refreshing to me, but there was still sincere love in their voices. Their talks made such an impression they may as well have put their hands on my shoulders, looked me square in the eye, and addressed me directly. I could feel a spiritual elbowing of the ribs. There's something to learn from everyone during Conference, but not every talk, every hymn, every prayer has to be a home-run. That said, I think (for me) this Conference certainly rounded a lot of bases.

Friday night I got my hairs cut. I was fed up with the shabby state of my too-long hair, so I walked into a Super Cuts and declared my immediate need for a trim. Bye-bye 5 inches of Lauren's hair. Why cut so much? I kept seeing a lot of cute medium/past-the-shoulder length hairstyles and decided I wanted a little past-the-shoulder action myself. Now re-read that last sentence without the innuendo. Creeper. The stylist shampooed, trimmed, layered, and dried my hair in record time and I was very happy with the result. Here's a question: Why does it feel so good when someone else shampoos your hair?

And now, the last thing...

Lauren's big reveal at the beauty salon!

That one time I almost cried in middle of Zumba...

In the last 48 hours I have enjoyed only about 10 hours of sleep. I yawned twice while writing that last sentence. And I don't even have The Hunger Games midnight showing as an excuse. I have simply felt sleepy without being able to fall asleep - a victim of exhausted restlessness. So while I should get into bed and put these old bones to rest, I resist. Because, despite the yawning, I know sleep is still a ways off.

Something strange happened this morning. I don't have any real explanation for it, but maybe there's a correlation with my current sleepless state. I woke up at 8:00 AM and got ready for my 8:30 Zumba class. Normally I would sleep in and make an appearance at the 10:30 class, but this Saturday I simply had too much packed into one day to accommodate sleeping in. Though I needed it desperately. "Bailar! Bailar!" 

Once I was up and moving around, I felt better. And once I made it to class and started dancing, I felt invincible. Like I could tap dance on the ceiling with Fred Astaire. Or tear through a phonebook... with my teeth. Take that, early Saturday morning! I have no need of the sleep! Yes... I was hopped up on a strange combination of hyperactive endorphins and mind-numbing fatigue. That's when the strangeness began. I believe I was dancing to Ke$ha's "Blow" when my emotions came full circle and my eyes filled with tears... (I'm not often moved to tears by Ke$ha...) Was I crying? What the heck? It was like I became so deliriously exhilarated that my happiness pushed through all other emotions. Don't worry, I didn't start crying on the dance floor. I just shrugged it off, shaking and shimmying my way through the rest of the song. Can you imagine how awkward that would have been? But seriously, it was weird. Like I was experiencing transcendental euphoria. Something akin to nirvana. I liked it there. 

And now, after re-reading my post, I feel now would be a good time to tuck myself in and say goodnight. As we've seen, a sleepy Lauren is an emotionally unbalanced Lauren.