Inventory

Breaking radio silence and returning to take inventory of the last few months or so. 

January

Moved out of my parents' house... yet again. I made the decision to move out waaaaaay back in August when I started working at Rainey Homes. So it only took me 5 months to finally pull the trigger. That Lauren's a slow mover.

Started another semester at SLCC, this time with a full schedule that had me bouncing back and forth between Salt Lake and Davis County a couple times a day. It's the most classes I've taken at one time since going back to school - mildly terrifying.

Got through some emotional hurdles after the move, most difficult of which was a sense of isolation. This coming from an introvert. 

February

My biggest incentive in taking on more credit hours was so I would qualify for a tuition waiver through SLCC's Visual Art & Design program. Apparently they have scholarship money just laying around so I upped my course load and applied. I made it through the first round of the application process and later had to present my working portfolio to a room full of department heads - extremely terrifying!

Received said tuition waiver. I like when school pays for school.

March

Went on a family vacation to St. George to see a Queen cover band perform at Tuacahn. The concert was excellent, which was good because if it hadn't been this vacation might have gone down as one of the worst in Waters history. Rivaling even the capsized boat incident of 2003 at Lake Powell... Let's just say you never want to lock your keys in the trunk of your rented 2015 Volkswagen Passat. You will be carless until someone smarter than the car's computer can find a way to liberate your keys. In our case, that meant several days and 2 tow-truck trips while the car held our personal belongings hostage.

Submitted 4 pieces to the 2016 Student Art Show, 3 of which were accepted. Allow me to remind you of the lengthy entries about last year's show. 

Received 2 awards at the show. One of which was... uh... Best in Show. I received it for a piece I designed in my Advanced Typography and Layout class last semester. My design instructor explained that a design piece hadn't taken the top prize in the show in over 10 years and that it was A VERY BIG DEAL. I promptly threw up in my mind.

Here's more about the project and the show itself if you're keen. What's sad is there are so many little things I would go back and change. Still might. Sometimes you get too close to your own work and just can't look at it objectively.

April

Had to act as Creative Director for a group project in my Advertising Workshop. I discovered that I like taking charge when I'm not in charge, but once you make it official and slap a title on me I'm not so enthusiastic. I guess that means I prefer the lead-from-behind approach. Actually, I prefer the it's-too-important-I'll-just-do-it-myself-becuase-I-don't-trust-you approach.

Was informed by my roommate of 4 months that she would be selling her home over the summer. I decide to ignore this added bit of anxiety-inducing news until the semester was over and I had the luxury of freaking out in earnest, thank you very much.

Took another trip down to St. George with a friend to see the Beach Boys at Tuacahn. Well, what remains of the Beach Boys. We were rained on (a lot), but didn't mind it... so much. Nobody else seemed to either because the venue was packed. "God Only Knows" was probably my favorite number, but the saxophone solo on "Kokomo" was a close second. Very smooth.

Purchased tickets for the Coldplay concert coming in August. Ended up paying lots of money for a couple of so-so seats and then another small fortune in processing and "convenience" fees. I wonder how much less I'd pay if I were inconvenienced?

May

End of the semester. My heart rate returns to normal.

Saw Captain America: Civil War. This is noteworthy because my life is basically measured in release dates for Marvel movies and British TV shows. You laugh because you think I'm kidding. I laugh because I know I'm not. With the introduction of Benedict Cumberbatch as Doctor Strange, they've basically guaranteed my devotion for at least a few years more. But I am reaching my limit on the superhero movie front.

And while we're on the subject of Captain America, can I just say that I will never get over Peggy and Steve as long as I live. I think theirs is the most tragic narrative arc in the entire Marvel Universe. And then they go and cancel Agent Carter on ABC. Will I never have closure??

Started summer semester. I get to paint sometimes naked people 2 nights a week for 3 hours! Fortunately it's just the one class, but I'm back to using oil paints which is still a frustrating medium for me.

June

Moved again! And not back home to my parents' house like the coward you think I am. Hopefully this will be it for awhile. Moving has officially become my least favorite thing and the next time it happens, I'm just setting all my stuff on fire and starting over.

Besides all the boring minutiae in between, that should officially bring us up to speed. And aren't you glad?

Hypothetical Questions

How old am I really if I watch PBS News Hour followed by Antiques Roadshow?

If I am a self-proclaimed hater of country music and then buy tickets to see Garth Brooks in concert, does that make me a hypocrite?

What if I hope Bernie Sanders wins the 2016 Democratic nomination so I don't have to choose between Hilary and whatever bottom-dwelling troll the Republican party nominates? Take your pick...

If I cut off all my hair and neglect to post a photo of it on social media, did it really happen? Checks mirror... Yes, it did. 

Why are so many of my Facebook friends organizing parties and boutiques to sell me stuff? I feel rude declining so many event/group invitations. Then again...

If I'm interested in someone older than I am, how old is too old? Considering I watch PBS News Hour and Antiques Roadshow?? 

How often should I visit my dentist? Is every 6 years often enough?

Does having an opinion about something make me an expert? If so, my Facebook feed is full of experts. Time to deactivate Facebook? 

And lastly...

If my sister wore my shirt to her photo-op with Chris Evans at ComicCon, isn't it kinda like I'm in the picture too? And if his hand is totally touching my shirt, isn't he basically touching me? 

Girls' Night In

Well, last night was a bit of a bust, but at least it was a fun bust. My sisters and I made plans for dinner and a movie, but never specified what we wanted to do for either. Since we couldn't all agree on dinner, we ended up getting takeout from 2 different restaurants. Picking a movie? Forget it... Instead of carting a bunch of random DVDs to my sister's house, we opted for the blue-ray player. You know, so we could spend half the evening researching and arguing over movies on Netflix. Except when we arrived at my sister's and set up the player we realized the remote control had been left at home. Useless.

So Lauren was sent on a quest to find a movie. A quick trip to a local Redbox resulted in 2 random picks: The Best of Me (James Marsden?? Well, okay.) and Woman In Black 2 (because it seemed an ironic choice for our girls' night). Neither were high on my list, but the selection was pretty limited. And I just haven't worked up a desire to watch the final Hobbit movie yet... 

So we watched Woman In Black 2 first. All of us had seen the original and decided the sequel was much less creepy. Except that possessed rocking chair was back and anytime it started rocking and creaking on its own (which was about half the film) I had to plug my ears and look away. There's a rocking chair in the room next to mine so I don't like thinking about it. 

Next up was The Best of Me. We just needed something to dispel any bad juju that lingered from the first movie, even though I really don't care much for Nicholas Sparks. I feel like I was run over and left for dead by whatever bandwagon people jumped on when The Notebook first came out. But let's not dwell on what is probably Sparks' masterpiece compared to last night's viewing selection...

Trademark Nicholas Sparks Movie Poster Format

The Best of Me is about high school sweethearts who are reunited after 21 years when their friend passes away. You don't know much about either of them except that Dawson (James Marsden) recently survived a major explosion on an oil rig that jettisoned him into the ocean where he bobbed like a cork for 4 hours, contemplating the meaning of life. Then there's Amanda (Michelle Monaghan), a woman trapped in a loveless marriage to a wealthy, self-absorbed, golf-playing alcoholic. Because of course. The two are soon confronted by their shared past - a story which unfolds in a number of flashback sequences as they clean out their deceased friend's home.

Which brings me to my biggest gripe of the entire movie. Young Dawson - who had more screen time than older, handsomer Dawson - was played by an actor named Luke Bracey who is shown here next to James Marsden...

Double take!

They could be twins, right?? No, they could NOT be twins. I don't know who was responsible for this casting, but it didn't work. I felt like I was watching a movie about 2 different people instead of younger and older versions of the same person. This photo doesn't even do their differences justice - it was so distracting!

Anyway... The movie played out more like a Hallmark Hall of Fame feature with its gag-inducing cliches, but it still had about everything you could expect from Nicholas Sparks. Whose movies really are just big budget Hallmark Hall of Fame features when you think about it. I'll admit, there were a couple moments I couldn't help but go "Awww..." but then there were also little gems like this one:

You want me to fall back in love with you? How do I do that if I haven't ever stopped? 

Terrible...

But despite its overwhelming predictability (I called the ending about halfway through), there was a little last minute twist that took the story to a new level. A ridiculous level, but at least it was somewhat unexpected. If you want to know what it was, just ask.

So that was our girls' night in. A takeout shmorgasbord, a horror film we watched from behind our fingers, and a chick flick we openly mocked but still enjoyed... for all the wrong reasons. 

Good News/Bad News

Good... I let a lady cut ahead of me in line at Michaels Crafts over the weekend. She had only a few items compared to my cartful so I thought I’d be polite. I later realized it was Sister Jean A. Stevens, 1st counselor in the General Primary Presidency... I KNOW.

Bad... When the cashier asked if she’d like to donate a dollar to purchase a book for charity, she declined. Come on, Sister Stevens... Pay it forward.

Good... I’m back in the habit of taking my daily walkies, either up at Planet Fitness or around my neighborhood depending on the hour. Spring is ideal for walkies.

Bad... Sometimes these walks are very late in the evening. But I’ve found this body prefers even late night exercise to no exercise at all. Which can be annoying.

Good... I was released from my calling as a Relief Society teacher. No more of the-gospel-according-to-Lauren! I’m now the communications chairperson for my ward, which means I’m in charge of our ward emails, Facebook page, bulletin, etc. It’s the cushy behind-the-scenes calling I’ve been waiting for.

Bad... I don’t know if they thought putting me in charge of getting information to everyone about ward activities would persuade me to actually show up to stuff, but… it hasn’t. Not yet. The girl who had the calling before me said while she tried to make the weekly emails about activities sound fun and inviting, she herself was strictly a Sunday only meeting-goer. To which I said, “Bless you.”

Good... I went to Zumba for the first time in months and months. My membership for Salt Lake County Parks & Rec facilities expired last year and with it my unlimited access to Zumba classes. But my sister, who still has her membership, offered to pay for this evening's class for me. How nice!

Bad... I do not have Zumba knees anymore. I have not-Zumba knees. All that twisting and fancy footwork will surely plague me tomorrow. 

Good... 2 of my pieces were given the thumbs up for the student art show! Shut up about school already, Lauren...

Bad... They still have to pass the in-person jury process. Which meant framing both pieces and handing them in. I’m feeling pretty good about one of them, but we’ll see what happens.

Good... Finally, some rain! And a bit of snow, too. I was giddy all day.

Bad... Not sure if the occasional rainstorm will compensate for our very dry winter, but I'm grateful for every drop that falls. Even if I hate driving in it. 

Thumbs Up/Thumbs Down

So I'm posting about school again. Sorry?

With some persuading from an instructor and a couple classmates, I submitted a few pieces to the SLCC Student Art Show. It covers all types of media, from fine art to digital, so what will ultimately end up in the show is anyone's guess. The criteria was limited to "Submissions are due by 11:59 on Wednesday, March 29th." No mention of how many pieces will be picked overall, let alone for each category. I'm supposed to find out before April 2nd which of my pieces are "Juried In" (green thumbs up) and which are "Juried Out" (red thumbs down). Brutal...

A few people have asked to see my work, so I'll show you what I submitted for the show as well as a couple others I like. Hopefully there's something in here the judges will raise a thumb to. I am still learning. If anything, just appreciate the fact that I've come a long way and that paintings don't photograph very well, okay? Okay.

At the Breakfast Table, Oil painting, Study in light to shadow relationships

Lauren's Hand, 29 Years I, Oil Painting, Study in light to shadow relationships

Lauren's Hand, 29 Years II, Oil Painting, Limited palette/time

The Boy Who Would Not Grow Up, Oil Painting, Tonalist

Long Day, Oil, Limited palette/time

Honest Abe, Graphite

It's a Color Match After All, Color matching assignment using cut out paint swatches
(This assignment got the Mary Blair treatment.)

Incomplete Thoughts

In anticipation of the New Year, I've compiled all of my unfinished blog posts. These were drafts I started, but didn't know what to do with. You'll see why...

So here they are! In no specific order, Lauren's incomplete thoughts of 2014...

• I hate anxiety... I really do. I hate the sunken uneasiness it fills me with - except anxiety doesn't really fill, it empties. Confidence, optimism, self-assurance, and even faith are all poured out and replaced by hollow dread. Triggers for my anxiety vary - we all have them - but the very worst is the anxiety you can't quite explain. So you try to figure it out and find a reason, because there must be a reason... But there's not always a reason. You start asking what if? when you should really ask so what? and move on...

• Beautiful spring days make these empty work hours go by so slowly. I made the mistake of logging onto Yahoo to check my email and soon found myself browsing a couple “news” articles. One was about women’s health and fitness and while the article itself was clever and informative (PINNED!), many of the responses posted in the comments feed below were DISGUSTING. Not to mention irrelevant. I’m still untying the knots in my stomach. As I read these hate-filled rants about women’s bodies, I marveled at how anyone could articulate such ugly thoughts, even from behind anonymous internet profiles...

• There are periods throughout your life when you're comforted by the thought that there's still time for everything...

• Feeling pretty discouraged by what I've heard in the news over the last few months. When you try to understand what's happening on a global scale, it's hard to find much joy in those things that exist at your fingertips. You would think that kind of perspective would make me more appreciative, and I guess it does... But you also wonder (or at least I wonder) at how the impoverished, abused, and oppressed shoulder so many burdens... You wonder what others might achieve with the same opportunities and freedoms you have; how they might do it all a little better...

• Blogging doesn't seem to be much of a thing anymore. Very few of my friends post on their blogs these days. There are capital 'B' Bloggers and lowercase 'b' bloggers. I'm not really socially or financially invested in this blog and have only about 6 readers (Hi, Mom!) so I suppose that lumps me with the latter. But like most bloggers, ultimately I'm here to amuse myself...

• It's so late. Too late. I'm already losing ground on the hour of sleep I gained over the weekend with the end of Daylight Savings...

• As I listen to those shouting from the fringes of public opinion clamor for what's politically and socially "right," I often wonder where I stand. Confronted with an opinion, I may think, "Nope... I don't think so," only to react similarly when confronted by an opposing opinion. Can an opinion, based on one's personal experiences and beliefs, be absolutely right? Or is it only right for the individual and those who share similar experiences which have formed similar opinions? Does it matter? I guess I don't really believe that opinions can't be universally right or good, but lately I've found myself in a void - a state of perpetual gray where nothing seems as black and white as others claim. Do most people quietly form their own opinions by processing the scarred bits of information thrown at them each day? Patiently listening, hoping to understand all the noise while everyone else just shouts?

• I want my very own life coach. Not the kind that checks in every once in awhile to see how things are going, but someone who could shadow me throughout the day. Someone to motivate me from the moment I trundle out of bed in the morning. Someone to cheer me on and celebrate my successes, however small, while downplaying my failures, however large. Someone to swat away negative thoughts and influences before they take hold. Oh, yes...

There are a few drafts I'm saving that are more fully realized. We'll share those eventually or just delete them. Sometimes it's enough to just find the words and then move on. This is a funny little blog, I know. But I appreciate the outlet it provides for all my muddy thoughts. 

How can I know what I think 'til I see what I say?

E.M. Forster

Not Milestones

Here's a list of recent milestones that aren't really significant so I guess they're not really milestones...

This week I decided to part ways with Salt Lake County Rec Center and join up with Planet Fitness. The membership won't cost me quite as much and I like that they're open 24 hours a day on weekdays. Yesterday's evening jaunt began at 11:00 and ended close to midnight. Still, I don't think I'll make late night workouts a habit. It's just nice having options. 

I've studied the scriptures and read at least one article or story from the Ensign everyday this week. Just flexing some spiritual muscle after our most recent (and most excellent) General Conference. Though it's probably become a little muddied since, I'm trying not to lose that post-Conference glow. We'll keep it together... Kinda... And exercise patience with the whole process.

I embarked on the thrilling task of cleaning out my email accounts. Someone showed me how to unsubscribe from the many companies that have added me to their mailing lists over the years and buried me in useless information. No more sales announcements from Oshkosh B'Gosh. No more newsletters from the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. No more coupons for tasty new sandwiches at Arby's. No more.

Last week I attended Frightmares at Lagoon for the first time ever. Lots of spooky stuff, but not too spooky. I even in went into one of their scariest attractions - a zombie detention facility where the "zombies" had taken over and were hunting for brains (of course). I was startled a few times, but it wasn't that bad once you realized the zombies screaming in your face and chasing you down dark corridors were really just skinny teenagers in heavy makeup. If I want to be scared witless, I'll just stand in line for the Wicked ride. UPDATE: No lie... As I typed this paragraph, The Cranberries' Zombie started playing on my iTunes.

I made a potato salad for a work potluck and it was a hit. Potato salads are tricky. In all my years of potlucks, picnics, and barbecues, I haven't come across a recipe that's quite as tasty as my aunt Annette's. Who knows? Maybe this potato salad will achieve the same notoriety as my supervisor's highly revered and oft-requested spinach, cheese, and jalapeño dip.

Heart of the Artist

Room's still a shambles. I have 2 1/2 seasons of Gilmore Girls left, 6 samples of paint, 23 boxes of laminate, and 1 1/2 walls left to patch up and sand down. And school has started once again. Who knows how long I will live like a first world refugee in my parents' basement?

With school starting, I've had to overcome a few inevitable flare-ups of anxiety and insecurity - Why am I here? Should I be doing something else?? I already have a degree! I've taken only a couple classes during each of my semesters at SLCC so far, mostly because working full time doesn't give me many options. Especially if I want to excel in each class, which I really do. So while the work for this degree is happening slowly, at least it's good work.

One thing I've had to separate in my mind - and it really sounds so stupid, but this is the level of insecurity we're dealing with - is embodying the image of an artist vs. working as an artist. As if looking the part suddenly means more than the work itself. When the semester started, I realized there were some pretty hip folks in my classes that seemed to fit a certain aesthetic we associate with artists and designers. (I've seen enough movies and read enough cool design blogs to know what they look like.) I saw them and worried that perhaps trendy outfits, large frame glasses, body piercings, and/or a few tattoos gave them an advantage. Because they looked... artsy. See? Stupid. 

We're now 4 weeks into the semester and I'm starting to feel more certain of myself and my classes. I've realized that one advantage of pursuing an education in visual arts is that, whether you look like an "artist" or not, your work is what's important. And it doesn't require the type of performance that puts you directly in the spotlight. I can work quietly and anonymously at home or in a classroom setting without the physical act of creating being under scrutiny. My instructors are the only ones who occasionally step in to offer guidance or feedback. And suddenly there is this thing that I've created, and while the thing itself represents me, it is still not me... It's external. If that makes sense...

In both classes - one is Typography & Layout, the other is Foundation Drawing 1 - we have class critiques for each of our projects, but it's generally a positive experience. Like myself, my fellow classmates are all so involved with their own pieces that there's little time for worrying about how well others are doing. Instead, we feel mutual appreciation for each other's talents, especially as we consider the level of difficulty required for each project. It's an encouraging atmosphere and ultimately, our completed projects speak for themselves, whether they speak well or not. 

Hopefully mine speak well. Even if I don't necessarily look the part. 

Through all the world there goes one long cry from the heart of the artist: 

Give me leave to do my utmost! – "Babette's Feast", Karen Blixen 

Underground

Gloomy weather makes for gloomy dreams. 

I dreamt the other night that I was driving my Corolla through a city. Rain and fog obscured my surroundings, but I was headed somewhere in a hurry. It was early in the morning and except for me, the streets and sidewalks were empty. Finally I pulled off the road, parked my car, and walked across the street toward an old building. Through the fog, I could make out letters above its large, open entryway: Marylebone Station...

...Then I woke up. 

Lauren's Open Letters...

Dear Pinterest,

Cool it with the near-pornographic health & fitness pins of women flexing their tanned, air-brushed bottoms in tiny panties. Do you want to motivate women or discourage them before they even know what your "booty-licious butt workout" is all about? Sounds gross. Looks grosser. 

Dear Rain,

More... MOOORRREEEEE!!!

Dear Important Public Figures Who Die And Are Suddenly Quoted By The Masses Online, 

I guess we're honoring your legacy by recalling all the beautiful things you said while you were still with us. Things we once pinned on Pinterest. Or scribbled on a Post-It we later placed on our bathroom mirrors as encouragement. (Maybe that was just me...) Yes, hopefully now we'll try a little harder to live by your wisdom... But let's also hope your words were attributed correctly on the internet to begin with.

Dear Cute Sandwich Guy,

Thanks for making my tasty turkey and cranberry sandwich on wheat. Though I'd still probably thank you even if you weren't cute, as attractiveness usually doesn't signify any guy's ability to make a tasty sandwich. But then this would be addressed to "Sandwich Guy" instead of "Cute Sandwich Guy," so... 

Dear Guy Running Next to Me On A Treadmill,

Uh-oh... You’ve jammed your machine a couple times now... I'm not sure hanging off the console like that is good running form. Looks a bit awkward. And you seem fit - I saw you walking upright when you got here! Just run with the treadmill, not against it. And if you can't, ease up on the incline and dial back the speed to a more comfortable pace. "It is not requisite that a man should run faster than he has strength." That's why you see me just chuggin' along. Let's chug together.  

Dear Ichiban Sushi,

Thank you for the extra eel sauce! You know you don't drizzle enough of that stuff on your Vegas Roll... Next time I think I'll just have a bowl of the eel sauce with my sushi as a side. 

Dear This,

I haven't heard of a Northern gentleman, but I do think an English gentleman trumps a Southern gentleman every time. I could drop a few names if you'd like...

Dear Girl Who Keeps Referring to Herself as a Solid 7,

I've heard you repeat the same dating stories a few times now. Stories in which you relate all the reasons why, on a scale of 1 to 10, you think you're a 7. Or how you've dated a bunch of zeros. As a Solid 3, I appreciate that you have better self-esteem than myself (unless this is really just an exercise in building confidence?) and yeah, I bet it is hard out there for a 7... But rating yourself and then gloating about it? I'm docking you a couple points. Which, I realize, would make me about a 1... Since I'm just sitting here complaining about you on the internet.  

Dear Roadkill Scattered All Over The Highway On My Way To Work,

You are one of the less pleasant signs of summer and you make me sad. Then after a few days, you make me sick. I often can't identify what you once were - probably something with a cute, furry face - but whatever your species, please save your little 4-legged selves and stay away from the road. Remember, that big loud thing with 18 wheels can move a lot faster than you and it doesn't care how cute you are.

Dear Adventure Time,

Like Spongebob Squarepants, you are funny, strange, and just a little bit perverted. Only slightly moreso.

Sincerely,

The Solid 3

P.S. Sometimes I hate everything I type (too snarky! too boring! too personal!), but then I consider the time I took to type it and the time it would take revising before I didn't hate it anymore... Aaaaannndd publish.

In Summer!

I never did choke on that darn fly. Like most flies, I think it attempted escape and ended up dying in the space between my window and window screen. You can only buzz around in there for so long... I also killed a giant spider the other day as it crawled out from under my bed. And don't forget the dozens of mosquitoes who met their own untimely ends as they sampled Lauren's all-you-can-drink-before-getting-slapped buffet. Ah, summer... 

Speaking of summer, today's temperature was just over 90 degrees. Which is entering uncomfortable territory for me. My clothes start feeling not right on my body, my hair feels like I'm wearing warm blanket over my head, and I lose energy with every increase in temperature. When I got home from work today I walked straight into my bedroom, stripped off my outfit, and collapsed on my bed where I napped for over an hour. After waking I felt like a human again, and not a surly she-beast. Now I'm back in bed - fully clothed in my PJ's, thank you - my box fan humming softly as it blows cool air from my bedroom floor. Ah, summer evenings...

Here are a few other things I enjoy about summer that I would do well to remember when I can't take the heat...

• Watermelon
• Trips to the pool
• Lots more daylight, especially early in the mornings.
• Fireworks
• "Those su-hummer (pause) na-hiiiiiights!"
• Slushies, Slurpees, Icees...
• Flip-flops
• Not having to pause at crosswalks or reduce speed in school zones on my way to work.
• Barbecues
• Outdoor movies and concerts
• Baseball games
• Lagoon

Hair, There, & Everywhere

Right now my hair is tied up in a bandana knot. I'm trying new hairstyles for my in-between-hair-washing days. Did you know you shouldn't wash your hair everyday? Well, apparently you shouldn't. Which works for me, because I don't. Just too lazy, I guess. I usually alternate between hair down on clean hair days and hair up on slightly-less-clean hair days. (Stop reading now if you want... This really isn't going anywhere...) 

Ponytails and buns can get pretty boring so we'll see how these bandana curls work out. I attempted foam curlers last week and the result was much, much more extreme than I intended. I spent half the day deflecting compliments like "Cute curls!" with a half-hearted "Oh, thanks." They're the kind of compliments well-meaning folks share as a way of politely acknowledging an obvious change in your appearance, whether that change is good or bad... or just different. Like when The Coworker dyed her hair maroon and I thought YIKES!! but what I told her was "Cute hair!" I could grow a beard and people would probably say "Cute beard!" Maybe if I curled it, anyway. Or dyed it maroon.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, compliments are nice. Even the insincere ones. 

Special Bulletin

Why is it that when you're all alone, whether at home or elsewhere, your hearing suddenly becomes superhuman? Yesterday after work I gathered all my supplies and drove up to our ward building to finally put up the new bulletin board. When I arrived, the sun was still out so I didn't feel nervous about being there all alone. Large empty buildings in daylight are not as menacing as large empty buildings after dark. Buildings like libraries, museums, and churches. Still, I tried not to think about it.

The ward itself was full of noises - the furnace firing up and blowing warm air through the rooms, doors rattling in their frames, little snap-crackle-pops of untrodden floorboards, and the buzz of fluorescent lighting. There was even a flurry of children's voices, but I'm pretty sure these were outdoors. No less creepy, though. Especially when your imagination torments you like mine does. 

I'm glad this didn't occur to me at the time, but our ward has an elevator that leads from the basement where I was working up to the main level. Can you imagine sitting alone in a church basement after dark and hearing the DING!! of elevator doors opening?? Like I said, my imagination is a bully. And the darker it got outside, the more noticeable all these noises were inside. My senses were heightened to the point where I was probably inventing some of them.

When I left 2 1/2 hours later I had to turn off the lights. Whoever designed the building 60 years ago didn't think to put the light switches near an exit. I would have to switch them off and then run through darkened corridors to reach the nearest exit. I switched the lights off once to get a sense of how dark it would be, but turned them right back on. Too dark! Off again. On again. OFF. ON. Okay, off again... And RUN!!

Here is a picture of the finished product... Because this post is already too long. 

Nowhere to hide...

Just when I thought Let It Go had finally released my Facebook feed from its icy clutches, another video started making the rounds, this time featuring Jimmy Fallon (Blast his impish charm!), The Roots, and Idina Menzel herself. When you do come across the video (it's inevitable), don't scoff and roll your eyes as I did. You'll like it. And you might even play it multiple times... And sing along... badly...

P.S. If you're looking for the link, that's too bad. By now I've learned one doesn't simply find this song, it finds YOU. Just wait. 

P.P.S. Ana had some cute songs, why don't we start making covers of those? "Hang in there, Joan..."

Wistful Weekend

Well, today was definitely a shuffle. Plans were made and then cancelled, dinner at way-too-crowded Cafe Rio quickly became dinner at the only-slightly-less-crowded Crown Burger, and movie watching gave way to lesson planning for Relief Society on Sunday. I even made little handouts... If the lesson doesn't go well - which is always a frightening possibility - at least the sisters will have something to show for it. 

Whilst assembling supplies and cutting out paper for my little lesson-savers, I distractedly watched the 2005 adaptation of Pride & Prejudice, glancing up here and there for my favorite parts. Parts like this one...

About 3/4 in, I turned it off. This is usually a go-to feel-good movie for me, but tonight it majorly bummed me out. Wistful - there's the word. Darcy was proposing to Elizabeth in the rain, and I just sat there with craft scissors in my hand and a lump in my throat. So I stopped the DVD and focused on my lesson. After a long day I just didn't feel up to boo-hooing over Jane Austen, thank you very much. 

Maybe tomorrow night.

Jack 'Em Up

Parts of a conversation I overheard today…

…My dad really loves Elvis. Like, loves him… My mom loves oldies so any time we were in the car we’d listen to 94.1… My stepdad listened to a lot of Metallica… So we were very well-rounded with the music we listened to growing up… I will, like, sometimes listen to 90s music, but not a lot cuz most of it’s AWFUL… If anyone asks me about modern music, I’m just like, ‘What is that crap?’… I really like (insert name of some band I have never heard of)… Here, this is my favorite… (hands over earphones to friend)… It’s called 'Jack ‘Em Up'… It’s about trucks… The music video has all of these really cool trucks… I know, right?? And usually I hate rap music…

Despite my love for 90s power ballads, I pride myself on having pretty okay taste in music - one of many delusions, I know - so my curiosity got the better of me. I tracked down the music video (<<< click this) for this song... It's performed by the Jawga Boyz featuring someone called Pastor Troy... Just in case any other well-rounded music listeners out there were looking to diversify your music libraries. 

...I'll stick with the modern crap, I think. 

Lately Lauren...

Likes

...Access to all of Downton Abbey Season 4 and Sherlock Season 3. I'm abstaining from just watching them all at once. Which I could easily do at this point, but let's savor them while we can, okay?

...A recent purge of my closet and other belongings. I hate being weighed down by STUFF. What would be a good name for the newly assembled pile of stuff now occupying a lonely corner of my room? A smother. A smother of stuff. And it's going straight to the D.I. where it can smother someone else. 

...The topic for my Relief Society lesson on the 19th. Now to keep myself from over-preparing.

...UN-decking the halls. Christmas is lovely, but all those glittering ornaments were starting to bum me out in this post-Christmas climate. 

..."Say Something" as performed by A Great Big World & Christina Aguilera. Also from A Great Big World, "This Is The New Year." It's a bit older, but very appropriate for obvious reasons. 

Another year you made a promise

Another chance to turn it all around

And do not save this for tomorrow

Embrace the past and you can live for now

...When my Dad brings home Spicy Buffalo Wings and Loaded Potato Skins to share. We'll forgive him for forgetting the Blue Cheese Dressing. Why did I capitalize so many things in those sentences??

...The entire office being excused early so we all had time to commute home safely.

...The musical episode of Psych and watching it with one of my very favorite families... "I've heard it BOTH ways!"

...My new phone! Long overdue... And it has a great camera. Too bad I can't take a picture of my phone with my new phone.

...My new coat from Old Navy! A steal at $20.99:

As much as I'd like to admit I find myself too enraptured with my list of likes to be bothered by much else, there are always just a few other things worth acknowledging... 

Loathes

...Smoggish fog and the armpit of winter. I hope it snows more to clear out the air and then promptly melts thereafter. I know we need the moisture, but let's make it rain instead! Ew, I said moisture.

...The prospect of school in one week... Sob.

...Nagging anxiety and the feeling of being pulled in about a thousand different directions. I can't seem to find a balance or prioritize everything going on right now and it's making me feel very unsettled.

...It's something I probably do all the time (maybe in this very entry), but lately I loathe the humblebrag. Bragging is bad enough without sugarcoating it with false modesty.

...The fact I get sucked into fashion and lifestyle blogs. I am both repulsed and transfixed. Essentially all these women do everyday is put on clothes and take pictures of themselves. Supposedly these blogs are designed to "empower & inspire" women (and some do!), but I think they also make us feel more insecure. Methinks the only woman who really feels empowered afterward is the one wearing the designer digs (c/o some-label-or-another) as she poses for her husband's camera. Hmmm... Tell me more about how $200 is a great deal for a pair of cashmere leggings. (Scrolls to view more pictures...)

...A looming visit to the doctor.

...Politics. That's all you're getting on that one.

Don't worry - fashion blogs are pretty low on my list of concerns. And humblebrags are just an occasional annoyance. Politics are always yucky, school comes and goes, and doctors visits are a necessary and uncomfortable evil we all endure. As far as the weather - it's Utah. A change of season is never very far off. But let's still cross our fingers for an early Spring. And lots of rain. 

A Great Weekend

I want a repeat of last weekend. Eight guys showed up to choir practice on Sunday, I completed a MAJOR to-do list on Saturday, and on Friday I attended the Josh Groban concert. As someone who fell for Josh (no shame!) after hearing him sing "You're Still You" on Ally McBeal over 10 years ago, I was mildly enthusiastic when the day of the concert finally arrived. But that's no secret - I did make a fake Lauren and Josh album cover and publish it on this very blog. Creepy photoshop habits die hard... Maybe it's not cool to like Josh Groban these days (or any day), but I've never been that cool anyway. 

Sometimes I feel funny about seeing performers I really like in concert. I don't know if it's because I worry about the illusion shattering or if I'm just weird about famous people in general. For example, if I saw Josh Groban at the grocery store, I would not run up to him. I would probably run away from him and find a really good place to hide where I could watch him from a distance. Hopefully this just means I'm shy, not weird and creepy. Anyway...

The man himself! - Josh looking right at me (I swear) - Lauren & Katie waiting in our seats - Lauren & Katie after the concert - Josh on the jumbotron -  Josh singing AND playing the piano (with happy feet) - Josh singing some more

I loved the concert. I cheered and hollered more than my family may have deemed acceptable, but I have no regrets. We met my aunt and cousins at the Little America Hotel for dinner then took Trax to the arena. I'll spare you the details and share just a few of my favorite things about the concert...

• The set list included old and new songs - I was surprised at how many new ones I liked. Like, all of them.
• Josh played the piano AND the drums. The drums were a surprise. 
• Judith Hill (Team Adam!) was the opening act and later joined Josh onstage for "The Prayer" and "Remember When It Rained." Beautiful!
• There was a violinist in the band who played a cool arrangement of Aerosmith's "Dream On." The hair from his bow was flying everywhere. 
• At one point, Josh and I both yelled the exact same thing at the exact same time in response to an audience member: "Imposter!" You had to be there... 
• We were treated to TWO encores. The first was "You Raise Me Up," which he invited me - I mean - everyone to sing with him. Chills! The second was Charlie Chaplin's "Smile." That may have been my favorite song of the evening!
• He seems to really love his fans. And they CERTAINLY love him back. I was happy to find my illusions of him only improved after attending the concert. He's adorable.

That's probably enough teenage swooning for one blog post. I recommend checking out the new album... It's called All That Echoes and I've been listening to it on a continuos loop all week long. You can find a youtube playlist for it HERE. Maybe we'll collaborate on his next album... A girl can dream! And dream, and dream, and dream...